Q: Is wearing a hat of meat harmful to my hair?

A: On the contrary, the protein and natural juices found in meat provide your hair with essential nutrients.

Traces of fat lubricate the follicles, in some cases even encouraging new growth.

Q: How can I prevent a hat of meat from going bad?

A: We suggest that when not in use, you keep your hat of meat in the refrigerator or freezer. For periods of prolonged exposure, spraying your hat with a thin coat of hairspray or Pam provides hours of protection.

Q: How do I discourage flies and dogs from pestering me when I am wearing a hat of meat?

A: A squirt-gun filled with lemon or lime juice is an excellent canine deterrent. A thin coat of hairspray on your hat of meat will keep the flies away.

Q: Is it safe for me to eat a hat of meat?

A: Except for hats made of beef or other types of jerky, it is not recommended that you ingest any type of meat hat.

Q: How can I combat the foul smell that sometimes comes with older hats of meat?

A: A simple solution is to lightly baste your hats of meat with barbecue sauce, teriyaki or other aromatic marinades.

Q: Is there such thing as a wig or toupee of meat?

A: Yes. Manhattan’s trendy “Meatheads” shop offers a wide selection of hair replacement options made entirely of meat.